Know... Your... Enemy!

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H2Oz
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Joined: Tue May 12, 2015 2:21 pm

Know... Your... Enemy!

Post by H2Oz »

They're more vile than Al Qaeda or ISIS. They're more sinister and more formless, because we don't even have a name for them.

Their leaders are obscenely rich, jaded old perverts with a logically untenable philosophy but an extensive support system.

They rely almost exclusively upon a seemingly endless supply of gullible, unsophisticated youths to carry out their evil agenda.

They patiently build their infernal devices, deliver them, and then have the temerity to trumpet their infamies in the media.

They send the deadly products of their twisted minds here from backwards countries whose corrupt leaders protect them, and we send them our dollars.

I am referring, of course, to the evil-hearted psychotic bastages who design, build and sell more-than-two-piece flyrods.

Essentially, these people present the same strategic and tactical problems as those which were presented by Osama Bin Laden, but we'll eventually send them some "Seal Team Six Therapy" -- IF we start NOW to get serious about detecting them. There's a lot we can do right away:

1. Much as the rhetoric of the terrorist is a dead giveaway with such phrases as "jihad" and "death to the infidels", we need to have the NSA on the lookout for telephonic conversations or emails in which people use such tell-tale phrases as "you can stow it in a backpack" and "easily transported in even a small car".

2. We need to have our TSA people trained to spot and confiscate suspiciously short rod tubes or cases, and our customs agents must be equipped with shipping container scanners which can detect any small-diameter tubular graphite or fiberglass products less than four feet in length.

3. We need to locate and bomb the rod-action-deadening factories from which their hateful multiple graduated ferrule sets spew, and go after their Madison Avenue co-conspirators who are poisoning the minds of our youth right from the pages of our own sportfishing magazines.

Make no mistake, we WILL win! And our people will gather in the streets and cheer wildly when these man-monsters are at long last dead. Because, on that day, no flyfisherman will EVER again have to look to the heavens and cry out in anguish, "This piece of &^#*$% casts like a @&%$#^@ nine-foot pool cue!"

Yeah, I think that covers it.
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